Why you need to Ditch that Bullshit wad of Leather you call a Wallet

It’s 2 O’Clock on a Wednesday you’re at your desk grading papers or making that big sale. I don’t know doing whatever you do for a living, and you notice a sharp stabbing pain in your ass. No it’s not HR because you decided to call someone an asshole in the break room. It’s that big clunky bull crap wallet you’re carrying in your back pocket. Like George from Seinfeld, that wallet is so full that you are physically in pain, one ass cheek is an inch higher than the other and you are now developing debilitating back problems and your insurance won’t cover that. You know what you’ll have to do? You’ll have to sell your clothes, your bodily fluids, and shit maybe even your soul to pay for these expensive medical bills. It’s hell, it will truly be hell for you…YES YOU!

So you may be thinking to yourself “Mike, How in the Blue Hell am I supposed to avoid this nightmare scenario?” Well it’s simple, switch to a Front Pocket Wallet. Don’t be like this guy.

Not only are front pocket wallets thinner, more compact, and more organized. They are also oh so stylish and really force you to decide what you really need in that wallet of yours. Your Insurance Card? Or that Condom that you are never going to use; Kevin. I guess you have really one option. Yep, buy a slim front Pocket wallet. Do it and you will never have to go to the doctor again, I am not a doctor and saying that voids me of any liability should you decide to listen to someone who is mentally deficient and not go to the doctor.

But in all seriousness I just bought my second front Pocket Wallet, I made a totally not shitty photoshop detailing how it will look in my hand.

And before you say anything yes i bought a slim front pocket wallet with a wolf on it.


Because Wolves fuckin rule, and the name of this wallet is called the Alpha…Hell Yea

What Up Apache Pine? Tryna Sponsor? Tryna Send me free shit? Or another wallet? I can model…not good but I can.

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