So here I am sitting at the doctors office waiting to be seen, the middle aged mom sitting across from me has that “Dave Matthews Band is the best music ever” look on her face and I’m just waiting until I don’t have to be in this situation anymore. My luck immediately changes when she pulls out her IPhone 6 XR and starts typing a 80 page thesis paper to her friend Denise about how she didn’t get enough coffee in her venti iced coffee from Starbucks. The worst part about this whole experience? This psycho had the keyboard noises on and I felt every single letter rip through my soul like a million pins covered in pee.
I mean what kind of serial killer does that? In what universe is that type of behavior deemed acceptable? I’ve tried thinking of another noise that makes me feel as annoyed as the noise of someone’s chubby sausage fingers sounding out every letter, and you know what?
I got nothing. It’s literally like nails on a chalkboard for me, they shouldn’t even have the option to turn it on, it should be illegal to have it turned on. Can you tell how much I love that noise? Spoiler alert, I don’t
Legalize Ranch, Criminalize texting noises